5. Aliens: Colonial Marines
Sorry to the maybe one fan of this alpha-turd out there but this is the worst game on this list and the second from the Alien universe. Do people just not know how to make things good or what?
Colonial Marines wasn’t just bad, it was awful. So awful that even the failed economists at HMV are selling it now for £2.99. It’s generic, trope’d to Hell and not a patch on the excellent trailer used to promote it. IT’S GOT CLINT MANSELL IN IT FERRCHRISTSAKE. I actually dare you to go out and play this game but BE WARNED, it might give your console haemorrhoids.
4. Troy
A truly amazing trailer that hides how the acting is as wooden as the ships.
Troy isn’t a bad film, but for every sequence Eric Bana owns, Orlando Bloom flounces about like a wilting flower. For every ransacking of a religious temple by Achilles, there’s a panto villain chewing up the scenery.
It’s an inconsistently decent film but one that never managed to get close to encapsulating the all-round excellence of its trailer.
3. Gears of War 1, 2 & 3
Expecting a lot of flak for this one because 1) I’m cheating a bit and 2) Fanboys are known biters.
Gear of War is not a game series known for haunting melodrama and engaging storylines, it’s more about comparing testicle sizes than anything. Brutish and unflinching, it’s so odd to see it promoted with three of the best examples of “sadvertising” around. This entry is different from the rest of the list in that although the franchise itself wasn’t terrible, the trailer had little in common thematically.
2. The Matrix Reloaded
What better way to advertise the sequel to one of the greatest 90’s films than with COOL and RELEVANT music AND PUNCHES.
This is one of those great trailers that can pump you up just a little bit more even if you were really looking forward to the release anyway. It does everything a trailer does and experts covers up the gaping holes that would be the downfall of the latter two entries in the trilogy.
1. Dead Island
Watching this trailer and then buying this game made me the cynical old man 22 year old I am today.
Going to go out on a limb here and say that not only is this the best gaming trailer of all time, but it’s also the greatest trailer for anything. It’s emotive, it is beautifully executed aaaaaaand it has precisely fuck all to do with anything related to Dead Island. The trailer suckered myself and countless others into buying a shallow, repetitive and terrifically broken fuck-up of a game that has somehow become a series. Naivety, eh.
Did you think the choices were right or was I a little harsh? Be sure to leave a comment below and send me your best angry face if you disagree.
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