3. Treat Women like Objects
Why drive when you can make your girlfriend do it for you? Hell, you don’t even have to be in the car, just make her run errands for you. Abuse her verbally and sometimes physically to remind her of her place. Never forget how funny making a sandwich jokes are. If she makes a request or disagrees with you, ask her if she’s on her period.
Scoff when she mentions feminism. Cheat on her. Show your friends and the internet her nude pictures. Make her cook for you. Never pay for anything. Have at least five girlfriends at the same time. Sleep with taken/married women. Treat every woman that you interact with as if they were a piece of meat—nothing more than cattle.
4. Live in the Moment
Throw your trash anywhere but a garbage can, people get paid to clean up that shit – make ‘em work for it. Give a middle finger to the hippies and polar bears by driving a gas guzzling SUV and take up as many spaces as possible when you park. When you drink, be sure to binge drink and throw around racial slurs like they are going out of style, because political correctness has gone too far. Be a compulsive liar so you sound more interesting. Chain smoke and break other people’s stuff. Never apologize and to hell with consequences!
5. Everything Else
Laugh when people fail. Constantly remind people that you are ALWAYS right about everything. Think how can this situation help me? Hit friends unnecessarily, order the cheapest and girliest drink while out and start a fight with anyone who questions it. Get a boring job that gives you a few dollars to have an unfulfilled Saturday night out with your friends so you can spend Sunday showing off how drunk you were on social media. Get somebody pregnant, have a child that you raise badly. Repeat the cycle.
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