WWE SmackDown Live REVIEW: Full Results, Grades & Highlights for 04/17/18

The Superstar Shake-up began on Monday Night Raw, and SmackDown lost several performers while gaining an A-lister. Baron Corbin, Dolph Ziggler, and Natalya were among the SmackDown wrestlers moving to the Red Brand. We also received confirmation that the Miz will now be performing on Tuesdays, a move that provides a ready-made feud for Daniel Bryan. WWE looks smart for continuing to push conflict between Miz and Bryan years after Bryan stopped actively wrestling. Their feud should be a highlight of this summer, and could potentially lead Miz to feature in world-title matches against AJ Styles around SummerSlam time.

Intro: We see a video recap of Shinsuke Nakamura’s fabulously facetious interview with Renee Young last week. His disingenuous remarks serve as the soundtrack for Nakamura wrecking last week’s main event and hitting Styles with repeated low-blows.

Styles walks out to badmouth Nakamura. If you can tell a lot about a man by their failures, Styles said, then we’ve found out everything about Nakamura. I think that comment concerns how people handle failure. AJ says Nakamura isn’t just an artist, “he’s a con artist.” This barb reminds me of Ned Flanders telling Homer Simpson that his amusement park is really a “bemusement park.” Competing chants for both men; the chants for Styles sound higher-pitched. Styles refers to his bout with Bryan last week as “a real dream match.” Well, that sure makes his WrestleMania title match seem less special.

Styles announces he’s not leaving the ring until he confronts Nakamura. He’s calling for a fight, as Nakamura has “forgotten” how to speak English (such a great line last week). Instead, we hear Aiden English warming up his voice. He and Rusev walk out, with English holding his customized “Rusev Day” microphone. Aiden insults the Providence crowd – so they’re back to being full-on heels this week. Until English cues up the audience to tell him what day it is, and they roar their approval. AJ agrees to fight right now.

WWE Champion AJ Styles vs. Rusev (non-title)

– Rusev hits Styles with some early strikes, then charges directly into a Calf Crusher. Rusev looks ready to tap, so Aiden English jumps into the ring and beats up Styles.

Result: AJ Styles beat Rusev by disqualification when Aiden English interfered.

Grade: D-

– Rusev Day stomps away at Styles until Bryan breaks up the beating. He back-drops Rusev to the floor; Styles battles back to clothesline English out of the ring. In the spirit of Teddy Long, we may get a tag-team battle later tonight.

– Shane McMahon watches the action via backstage monitor. His new general manager, Paige (decked out in all black), joins McMahon to fulfill her manifest destiny.

FIGHTING WORDS: “In the immortal words of Teddy Long, ‘There’s gonna be a tag-team match, playa!’” – Paige

– God bless you, Paige. Bryan and Styles will indeed wrestle Rusev Day tonight. Paige hollas at us and takes her leave. Thinking himself alone, Shane also tries to nick Theodore Long’s push-down hand-dance; a returning Paige catches him doing it, then silently walks away.

– We get a graphic giving us a (plausible) attendance figure of 78,133 fans for WrestleMania 34. So we can stop hearing that Kid Rock song now?

– Shelton Benjamin walks to the ring sans Chad Gable, who has been sent to Raw. Benjamin references a complimentary tweet sent from his account last night stating that he sees big things in Gable’s future. Benjamin claims his account was hacked and that he never wrote such a message (save that excuse for when you really need it). He didn’t need Gable; the former Olympian needed him. Fun fact: Benjamin’s Twitter handle is @Sheltyb803. Another fun fact: WWE and its superstars should determine a better way to utilize social media so that the talent doesn’t undermine the next day’s scripts with Twitter posts.

– Benjamin says he needs the championship matches and other rewards that he’s owed. He says that Paige promised to book him against some “big competition”. Randy Orton walks halfway down the entrance ramp, then his music stops. He stops, takes a few steps forward, then halts again as Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy makes his entrance. Orton looks indignant as Hardy takes a lap around the ring.

Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin (non-title)

– Hardy stuns Benjamin with an early sit-down jawbreaker, but Shelton recovers to hurl him under the bottom rope. He follows up by blindsiding Hardy with a running chop-block to the left knee.

– Benjamin continues to work the knee in the ring. Hardy briefly comes back (mistakenly kicking Benjamin with his “bad” left leg before switching to the right boot), but Shelton counters Hardy’s double leg-drop into a single-leg Boston Crab. Hardy elicits fan sympathy so easily as he sells the bum wheel.

– Stuffing Hardy’s comeback, Benjamin stops a Whisper in the Wind attempt by shoving Jeff crotch-first onto the turnbuckle. Benjamin climbs the ropes to attempt a top-rope back suplex. Hardy headlocks him and knocks him to the mat, but Benjamin springs up and rocks Hardy with a leaping knee to the jaw. He goes for another top-rope maneuver. This time, Hardy blocks a superplex by dropping Benjamin’s face onto the top turnbuckle. He follows up with a Whisper in the Wind for a near-fall.

– Benjamin counters the Twist of Fate with a wheel kick for his own near-fall. He then leg-presses Hardy as Jeff tries to hit his Hardiac Arrest kick (ugh). When Benjamin tries to press the advantage, Hardy executes the Twist of Fate. That’s the RKO version of that move, not the Stone Cold Stunner version he used on Jinder Mahal at Raw. Hardy hits the Swanton Bomb for the win.

Result: Jeff Hardy pinned Shelton Benjamin with the Swanton Bomb.

Grade: B

– Miz cuts a promo via handheld camera. He asks Providence if they’d like to see Bryan punch him in the face tonight. When they cheer, he turns the camera to show that he’s at home with his family. Maryse (sporting sunglasses) carries their infant daughter into the camera shot. Miz proclaims that he’ll make his SmackDown Live premiere next week, and threatens to kick Bryan’s ass if he trolls him again on Twitter. Maryse scolds her husband for using foul language in front of their daughter.

– Sonya Deville and Mandy Rose are coming to SmackDown Live. We’ll see how they interact with Paige, who appears to be taking a fan-favorite approach to her GM duties.

Jey Uso v. Harper

– Harper sports his goat-skull mask during the Bludgeon Brothers’ entrance. Maybe he should go higher-tech with that look, or Rowan can downgrade to a sheep skull.

– Rowan and Jimmy Uso start sparring almost immediately outside the ring. Jey flies through the ropes at Rowan, who catches him and throws him up against the ropes. Jimmy saves his brother (and this match from disqualification) with a superkick. When Jey makes it to his feet on the apron, however, Harper unleashes a discus clothesline, then pulls his foe back into the ring for the pinfall.

Result: Harper pinned Jey Uso after a discus clothesline.

Grade: D+

– After the match, Rowan hits a big boot on Jimmy, who then has to shuffle awkwardly so he doesn’t fall on the Bludgeons’ mallets. Harper and Rowan attempt to drag Jey out of the ring. Jimmy bashes Harper in the ribs with one of the mallets, but is quickly overpowered by Rowan, who heaves him into the ring-steps. The Bludgeons drive Jey spine-first into the ring apron. They grab their mallets and train their focus on Jimmy, who’s sitting up helplessly against the ring-steps.

– Naomi runs out screaming to beg Harper and Rowan to spare her man. That’s one way to kill off the badass vibe built up by the Usos over the past year. Harper calls off Rowan, and the Bludgeons pick up their championship belts and walk back up the aisle.

– After a commercial break, Sin Cara stands in the ring. His surprise opponent walks out next.

Sin Cara vs. Samoa Joe

– Sin Cara throws strikes at Joe, then lands a springboard back-elbow. Joe doesn’t leave his feet. He snaps off his own punches, then grabs Sin Cara to bark at him.

– Sin Cara dips out of a powerslam attempt, then targets Joe’s left leg with a chopblock and kicks. When Sin Cara goes for another springboard maneuver, Joe clotheslines him in the back.

– Joe rams repeated knees into Sin Cara’s head. When the masked man crumbles, Joe picks him up by the tights and locks in the Coquina Clutch.

Result: Samoa Joe beat Sin Cara via tapout with the Coquina Clutch.

Result: C-

– Joe commandeers a microphone and welcomes himself to the Land of Opportunity. He calls SmackDown the Land of Handouts, as the roster has “had it easy” due to Joe’s absence. Joe name-checks Styles, Bryan, and Orton as his future victims. He then threatens to put Roman Reigns out to pasture for good. Great, threatening promo from Joe, who should stand out on a brand without Reigns, Brock Lesnar, or Braun Strowman.

– We watch that wack music video trumpeting the return of co-branded pay-per-view shows. Superstars feign singing the uplifting song, which sounds tone-deaf considering that this transition is the result of WWE’s failure to sustain its brand-exclusive events. And that lone shot of Rowan grooving to the beat is really stupid and counterproductive.

– “Chaos Arrives” in the form of Sanity next week.

– Young asks Bryan backstage why he helped Styles earlier tonight. Bryan responds that he respects Styles. Bryan says that, when he was prevented from wrestling, he made a list of superstars he wanted to wrestle in order to motivate himself. Styles was at the top of that list. Sounds believable.

– Renee trails off while asking her next question. Bryan turns around and looks into the sternum of Big Cass. He condescends to Bryan over his height, calling him “Little Man”, then walks away. That was brief.

– Time to Mellabrate! Carmella moonwalks out for her Mellabration. She props up the championship belt on an in-ring table as Corey Graves repeatedly shushes his fellow announcers when they try to contribute their thoughts. Carmella gloats over beating Charlotte Flair “all on my own.” She declares that her championship victory will go down as the biggest moment in women’s history. Yes, all of it.

– Carmella introduces her own highlight video, which is suspiciously bereft of Ellsworth. You’d forget he literally tossed her the Money in the Bank briefcase last year. After the video, Carmella says she’ll miss Frankie (her briefcase), but she plans to keep Cleopatra (her title belt) even longer.

– Charlotte Flair interrupts the Mellabration. She tells Carmella the only reason she had the briefcase was “because of that chinless freak” – who goes unidentified by name. Flair congratulates Carmella, then warns her that it’s harder to stay on top than to get there.

– The Iconics surface. Peyton Royce did her obnoxious, infantile impression of Charlotte again; it kinda works this week, too. Both Royce and Billie Kay inform us that the “few-cha” is iconic. Flair attacks them, but the Iconics take over to batter Charlotte against the ringside barricade. Becky Lynch shows up one week too late to even the odds.

– Rusev is once again the Undertaker’s opponent for a Saudi Arabian casket match. Great clustermess, guys!

Charlotte Flair vs. Billie Kay

– We join this match in-progress. Because it would have been impossible to halt the proceedings and wait four minutes so we could see this bout in its entirety.

– Flair throws strikes at Kay, then brings her inside the ring. Kay turns the tide with some kicks, but Charlotte seizes her for an overhead suplex. Her momentum crashes when she slingshots over the top rope from the apron for no reason, allowing Kay to smash her with a forearm.

– Royce is delightful in living and dying with her teammate’s in-ring success. She talks trash, she jumps around like a cheerleader, she even bashes Charlotte when the referee isn’t looking.

– Kay utilizes an “Eat Defeat” type maneuver, which is open to use since Enzo got jettisoned. Charlotte evades a big boot from Kay, then lands her own kick. Flair applies the Figure Eight. Surprising to see Kay tap out mid-ring.

Result: Charlotte Flair beat Billie Kay via submission with the Figure Eight.

Grade: B

After the match, Carmella blindsides Flair with the championship belt. Lynch attacks Royce, but is overwhelmed by the numbers. Asuka’s music hits, and the Empress of Tomorrow runs to the ring. She blasts the Iconics as Carmella flees. Asuka, Flair, and Lynch stand tall as Carmella looks on with concern.

– A highlight video airs on Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson. The Good Brothers are headed to Tuesday nights.

– The Bar announce their SmackDown arrival with a handheld video shot in the locker room. They talk over horrible graphics showing their past opponents (the New Day, the Shield) shattering into pieces. Even their catchphrase must apparently be shown via onscreen graphics.

– The New Day roams backstage; Big E is riding piggyback on some guy wearing a sport-coat. They give him cereal as a reward. Then they cross paths with the “immortal” R-Truth and celebrate his arrival. Tye Dillinger walks up on the scene. He and Truth glare at each other before launching into a convoluted personal greeting. Truth trumpets their reunion on Monday Night Raw. His deflated acquaintances correct him on the date. The New Day affirms to Dillinger that Truth will not, in fact, be ok.

– Sanity will indeed debut on SmackDown (sadly, without Nikki Cross). They’ll be joined by Andrade “Cien” Almas. Cien and Zelina Vega warn us of their arrival in a video shot outdoors.

WWE Champion AJ Styles and Daniel Bryan vs. Rusev Day

– It appears that Styles was introduced first, followed by Rusev Day, and then by Bryan. That’s unique, and probably not ideal. Good move to spotlight Bryan, however, as a main event competitor two weeks running.

– Great line from Graves on English feeling despondent over losing the Pulitzer Prize to Kendrick Lamar. Not sure the Rusev Day song quite matches “All the Stars”, but a man must hold fast to his dreams.

– Bryan starts fast against English. He snags English in a surfboard, then tags Styles, who delivers a top-rope double ax-handle into Aiden’s unguarded chest. AJ goes for the Calf Crusher while Bryan intercepts Rusev and tries to apply the Yes Lock. Rusev Day counters those submission holds and skirts to ringside.

– We return from our final commercial break to witness English punishing Styles. It’s remarkable how long Styles stays vertical when absorbing back-body-drops.

– Rusev grinds away with a bear hug. So much change happening within WWE, but the Bulgarian Brute is still stuck as a heel. He clotheslines Styles after English feeds the WWE champion into his wheelhouse.

– Styles rocks English with a Pele Kick, then makes the hot tag to Bryan. DB ducks under a Rusev right, then propels himself off the ropes with tremendous velocity to deck him with a clothesline. Bryan tags Rusev with a corner dropkick, then makes another attempt at a Yes Lock. English interferes to prevent the submission from being locked in, then is back-dropped to ringside after he persists in attacking Bryan.

– Bryan blocks the Machka Kick, catching Rusev with a dragon-screw leg-whip. He laces into Rusev with Yes Kicks, then calls for his flying knee finisher. Graves compares a wobbly Rusev to Chong Li at the end of Bloodsport as Bryan cracks him with the flying knee. Then, outta nowhere…

– Nakamura runs through the crowd to uppercut Styles in the groin yet again. That man has dedication to his pursuits that the rest of us will never know. The referee misses the low blow; Bryan tends to his partner on the ring apron, when, outta nowhere…

– Having climbed into the ring as he pleased, Big Cass clocks Bryan with a big boot. The referee sees that blow and calls for a disqualification. So much outside interference here. Flashing the crazy eyes, Nakamura slithers back up the entrance ramp as Cass points his fist at the heavens. For a long time. Damn, Bryan sold that big boot for nearly three minutes at the end of this live broadcast.

Result: AJ Styles and Daniel Bryan beat Rusev Day by disqualification when Big Cass booted Bryan.

Grade: B-

– Renee Young buttonholes Nakamura in the live arena and demands an explanation for his actions. He responds with his catch-all excuse as Graves bemoans the tragedy of Shinsuke forgetting an entire language.

FIGHTING WORDS: “No speak English.” – Shinsuke Nakamura