BOOK REVIEW: ‘The Truth’ by Neil Strauss

Neil Strauss has lived quite the life, and chosen to share his journey along the way with readers. He’s written books with porn stars, famous musicians. In his own life, he chronicled his times in the pick-up community in the notorious book, The Game, talked about his plans for Armageddon in Emergency and now shows us his journey into becoming an emotional stable husband and father in The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book about Relationships.

From page one Strauss warns us that this isn’t going to be the kind of typical romance story that we expect. He even explicitly states that he’s not the hero, he’s the villain, and begins the book with apologies to his wife. It’s uncomfortable from the start, showing Strauss making a discovery that will rock his foundation of a stable childhood, and leading to some discoveries that will haunt him for many years to come. Pair that to the more recent events of Strauss cheating on his girlfriend leading to a journey of self-discovery, and like Strauss’ over books, he throws himself completely in the deep end like the best gonzo journalists.

Strauss’ journey takes him through alternate lifestyles such as living with three women, attending swinging parties, being in open relationships and attending plenty of different therapies in between. People may think that Strauss is living the dream in these situations, but Strauss is the first one to note that these situations are less than ideal. He asks the reader that although it may seem like some sort of sexual bliss, his last relationship didn’t work because he couldn’t handle being with one person, so when there’s three others in the mix it doesn’t get any easier.

The book is much more than a bragging list of sexual exploits, and instead follows Strauss on a journey to understand his own psychology, especially the events that happened in his own childhood. Strauss consults numerous professionals, and even admits that plenty of the experts have conflicting opinions. Ultimately, his message is clear, everyone should be having honest and healthy relationships and getting the help they deserve.

It may be the schadenfreude elements, but like in The Game or Emergency, the first half always seems to fly by much quicker than the second half. Perhaps this is due to Strauss’ captivating writing, but the real reason may lie that at the start Strauss is presenting himself in ground zero, where the reader is likely to relate to. We want to have healthy relationships, and we are excited to read on and know that the thoughts we’ve had are shared by others, and that it’s okay to feel unhappy. Due to Strauss’ high profile interviews, we even get insight from Orlando Bloom and Rick Rubin, though Strauss never makes this about star-studded cameos, more just that people considered the most attractive and successful men in the world can be as unhappy with their love lives of us.

If The Game is the bookend of how to attract people, The Truth is the other bookend on how to be happy once you’ve attracted them. It’s easy to fault The Truth for where it occasionally doesn’t land, but the context her is key. Strauss documented his journey and publically shared something that most families wouldn’t tell their children. He created a journey not just for himself, but invited everyone along to delve into the human mind and gives them the potential to have better relationships, in which manner they see fit, as long as it works for them and they’re partner.

Strauss proves with immersive research and detail that not only is he a natural storyteller, but that he may be one of the best gonzo journalists around. A book that is written with love, wisdom and the kind of spirit that after reading the final pages will make even the most cynical and unconventional people want to improve their lives, and those they share it with.

If you want to read what Neil Strauss had to say about The Truth and relationships, click here.