5 Awesomely Cheesy Movies Nobody Talks About

Twenty years ago, discovering a new and exciting movie to see on opening night was a bit of a chore.

Without the Internet, would-be moviegoers would have to rely on word-of-mouth, newspaper reviews or whatever crap spilled out of Leonard Maltin’s mouth. Back then, it was easy for an otherwise awesome movie with a smaller budget and a niche audience in mind to fall into the cracks.

Luckily for us, the internet has made things infinitely more accessible. We have Rotten Tomatoes, IMDb and Metacritic to tell us everything we need to know, except where we can discover hidden gems. Many of these have received negative to middling reviews, with some of them being resurrected as “cult classics” or whatnot.

And now for your enjoyment, here are five awesomely cheesy movies you should definitely watch this weekend.

 

CB4

I’m willing to bet that you didn’t know that this shiny gem about a rising gangster rap group in the early 90’s starred Chris Rock, huh? Along with Allen Payne and Deezer D, the trio sets about on their big break in the rap world, only to cross a psychotic (and sexually frustrated) drug dealer named Gusto by sending him to prison, and stealing his rugged persona for their own.

When Gusto gets out, mayhem and hilarity ensue as these three blue collar suburbanites find themselves in hot water and sinking fast, but not necessarily wanting to throw it all away because of their rampant success. With amazing cameos by Shaquille O’Neal, Ice-T, Ice Cube, Flava Flav, The Butthole Surfers and Eazy-E, CB4 never has a dull moment and will leave you rolling on the floor in hysterics.

 

Transylvania 6-5000

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABKy-Pqu-HQ

A spoof of classic horror films, Transylvania 6-500 has Ed Begley, Jr. and Jeff Goldblum(!) as reporters who are tasked with going to the titular area in pursuit of a tip on a monster attack. However, upon their arrival, the residents don’t seem to know about the spooky shenanigans and poke fun at them for even considering the possibility that monsters exist.

However, as these monsters are discovered one by one, the residents begin to show a darker side that no one could’ve anticipated. If you enjoy cornball humor, ironic encounters and are a fan of classic horror movies, Transylvania 6-5000 is just what you need in order to tickle your morbid funny bone.

 

Redneck Zombies

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7l1JAAS8LPs

An ultra-low budget zombie film by the awesome Troma Films, Redneck Zombies tells the tale of a barrel of toxic waste that is lost in the countryside, only to be discovered by a family of moonshiners who decide to use it as a distiller for their next batch as if it was a good idea. Of course, everyone who comes into contact with the disgusting green ‘shine turns into a flesh-eating zombie.

Meanwhile, a nearby group of campers are soon menaced by the zombies and discover the most unlikely ingredient that just may save their lives, but perhaps too late. Copies of Redneck Zombies can be bought through online auction sites, of course, but unless you’re a collector and find yourself curious, just jump on over to YouTube to watch it in all of its low-budget, cheesy glory.

 

Balto

An animated film starring the titular dog who also happens to be voiced by Kevin Bacon, Balto and his team are tasked with getting a serum for diptheria to Nome. Of course, Balto is accompanied by some friends along the way, such as Bob Hoskins as Balto’s winged sidekick, Bridget Fonda as Balto’s Husky love interest, and Phil Collins as not one, but two, polar bear cubs who tag along for the ride.

Despite middling reviews, Balto explores the integrity and unbreakable spirit of sled teams in unforgiving environs and packs a lot of feels, Whether you’re a furry or not, Balto is a film that both parents and children can enjoy curled up by the fire during a cold winter night, or anytime for that matter. And in case you’re curious, Balto was taxidermied after his death at 14 years old, and spends his days at the Cleveland Museum of Natural History.

 

Cloak & Dagger

Did you know that Henry Thomas starred in other movies besides E.T.? Cloak & Dagger came out in 1984, and told the story of Davey, a motherless boy whose enlisted father has issues connecting with him on a meaningful level. Desperate for a father figure, Davey recreates his hero, Jack Flack, to help make the everyday humdrum more interesting.

However, things get much more interesting when a dying man gives Davey a copy of Cloak & Dagger, stating that the cartridge contained important military secrets and to take it directly to the FBI. An engaging story with plenty of suspense and killing our heroes, Cloak & Dagger sounds an awful lot like another, more recent movie, huh? Despite tearing it up at the box office, there are still plenty of head scratches that can occur at its mention. Definitely check this one out.