Pea Bo’s Netflix Nasties: Would You Rather

Would You Rather is the latest victim of its own shitness in Pea Bo’s Netflix Nasties series.

A few people I know have urged me to watch ‘Would You Rather‘ for an episode of Netflix Nasties, so I caved. The reason I didn’t want to watch it at first is because I had a strange feeling it wouldn’t be too bad. To be honest, I wasn’t wrong. I was pleasantly surprised by the camera work and fantastic editing. This is a great example of an excellent crew and awful production team.

I felt like I’d seen the film before, and then it hit me. Nine Dead, my first ever Netflix Nasties was not all that different. Other than of course being so inexcusably shit, it hurt me to speak. A group of people have been put in a room together, and have to make decisions in order to save themselves. Drawing in elements of Saw, Hostel and, as I had already noted Nine Dead, it explores the human capability of sacrificing for our own selfish needs. Would we choose to save ourselves, or save someone else? Of course when it comes down to it, we always yearn to save ourselves. We make small sacrifices for our pride, but ultimately when it comes to death, there’s no question about it. It’s always a pleasure to watch something that deals with our weaknesses to such an extreme. Unless it’s ‘Would You Rather‘.

Firstly, don’t call your film ‘Would You Rather‘ – something which conjures memories of a darkened room, containing yourself, a few close friends and lots of people you’ve never met before. Smoke lingers around everyone’s lips as they utter the words ‘would you rather fuck him *points at the weird one*, or eat this *points at spider trying to escape glass*’. Obviously, this is a completely made up situation, and I did not have to sleep with a random guy, because a fleeting sexual encounter is more forgettable than eating something so small, it could dissolve in your tongue.

The film starts off with a young blonde girl who lives with her dying brother, and spends her days attempting to raise enough money for his surgery. This desperation leads her to accept her doctor’s invitation to a man’s house, where she could enter a ‘competition’ to win enough money for his surgery. Instead of screaming ‘HELL NO’, turning on her heels and strutting out of the building, she decides to go along. I felt the flaw from the very beginning. The idea was strong, but the execution was weak. She turns up at this house and guess who’s there? Oh, for a moment I thought this film could become interesting as Sasha Grey graced my screen. Like a chant, I found myself whispering ‘tiny brown titties’ over and over, hoping for a flash of nipple. Although, I feel I wasted my urge for Sasha titty on this film, when I could have just typed her name into Google.

SPOILER: no titties.

Against their will, they are forced to play Would You Rather, but it’s like ‘would you rather stab that person, or whip that other person’. They play the game and people start dying one by one. What really upset me was the lack of imagination behind these ’rounds’. They could have really explored the human psyche, but instead, touched lightly on compassion, sexism and pride.

‘Would you rather surgically remove a pound of flesh from that person using no anaesthetic, or castrate that person with a blunt knife?’ That was just from the top of my head. Imagine what I could do if I was a perverted murderer?

The characters were forgettable but some were too loud and boisterous. The ending, which should have been heartbreaking, left me laughing. Another situation of me laughing awkwardly in a silent room. I felt little to no connection to anyone in this film, which really upset me. It could have been great. But it isn’t. Again. Sorry.