PS2 Games That Wouldn’t Get Made Today

The gaming industry these days is a completely different beast to what it was over two decades ago, and because of this, some of your favorite PS2 games probably wouldn’t be released, at least in the same way, today.

 

1. The Punisher

Saying that a third person shooter wouldn’t get made today seems a bit strange, if we’re being honest. Some of the biggest games of all time are third person shooters, so clearly the genre isn’t going to stop a game like The Punisher from being made. In fact, given that we’re going to be receiving a Blade game at some point in the future, we’re not even saying that we’re never going to see Frank Castle star in his own video game ever again. The character still ranks among the most popular and recognizable comic book characters ever made, so it’s probably only a matter of time before someone decides to make The Punisher the main star of a video game once again. All we’re saying is that it probably won’t be quite as violent as Volition’s 2005 release.

Released as a semi tie-in of sorts to the Thomas Jane-fronted film from a year earlier, Volition’s The Punisher saw the actor return to voice Castle, as he goes on his usual one-man rampages across New York against the various crime families. While the action is fairly standard, albeit with the added ability to take human shields or perform close range melee kills, what really set The Punisher apart was its interrogations and executions. Basically, in order to get information or hints out of a perp, you’d need to threaten, intimidate or even pummel bad guys, before killing them in some of the most gruesome ways imaginable.

Woodchippers, flesh eating piranhas and an actual hanging all feature, and while there’s room for gory games like Mortal Kombat in today’s landscape, do we really think a Disney-owned Marvel is going to go for them? R-rated movies are one thing, but committing to that with a video game is another story entirely.

 

2. The Simpsons: Hit & Run

Top of the list of everyone’s “please remaster this” list, The Simpsons: Hit & Run didn’t have any right to be as good as it was. Radical Entertainment had already courted controversy by ripping off the Crazy Taxi formula a couple of years earlier with The Simpsons: Road Rage, something that would cause SEGA to sue Radical Entertainment for patent infringement. The case would be settled out of court during private mediation, but Radical’s prior reputation of concept copying led many to believe that The Simpsons: Hit & Run would just be a basic GTA clone with a few gags and Simpsons references thrown in to justify the license.

Don’t get us wrong, it is the most unabashed GTA clone you’ve ever seen, but it does so in a way that feels entirely Simpsons-esque, offering a fun game with all the humor you’d expect from a “Golden Era” episode of the show.

Playing as Homer, Marge, Bart and Lisa, along with Apu for some reason, the five characters travel across Springfield unraveling the cause of a surveillance conspiracy that could affect the fate of the whole town. While the possibility of The Simpsons: Hit & Run getting made today is pretty low just because of the inclusion of Apu, who was removed from the show in the wake of backlash because the character wasn’t voiced by someone from India, and probably the fees to pay the cast will just be way too high, those aren’t the main reasons.

Truth be told, it’s much easier for Fox/Disney to license The Simpsons to games like Fortnite, Roblox, Minecraft and others to make guest appearances, instead of commissioning someone to make a brand new, AAA game.

Any new Simpsons game is just going to be a mobile game loaded up with microtransactions, similar to Tapped Out. That’s the unfortunate truth, even if it does make us want to punch Lenny in the back of the head.

 

3. Bully

If you couldn’t tell from the music that plays in most of our PS2 era videos, we bloody love Bully, or Canis Canem Edit as it was known originally in the UK. We’ll get to why that’s important in a bit.

Rockstar’s tale of a delinquent-with-a-heart-of-gold Jimmy Hopkins, sent off to boarding school because his gold digging mother fancies a year long honeymoon was one of the most entertaining games on the PS2, rivaling even Rockstar’s work on the GTA series at times. Sometimes, you just want lower stakes games about high school hijinks and drama than having to deal with an entire city’s criminal underworld looking to either hire you or kill you. Hope for a proper remaster did ignite briefly back in August 2024, as Bully was rated for PS5 and Xbox Series X & S, but that appeared to be because Bully became available on the GTA+ subscription service.

We’re still crossing our fingers that Rockstar would chuck us a cheeky Bully remaster, one that’s hopefully miles better than the GTA Trilogy – Definitive Edition, but one fact needs to be confronted: Rockstar just isn’t the same company it once was. Back during the PS2 and PS3 days, Rockstar were releasing at least one game a year, but after the launch of GTA V, the well has dried up considerably. Unless it’s GTA or Red Dead, both games that are proven needle movers, Rockstar aren’t going to bother, regardless of whether it’s Bully, Midnight Club, Smuggler’s Run or Table Tennis.

Additionally, unless you’re following ATLUS’ example and using high school as a means to tell a different story, it’s hard to see a mainstream gaming studio make a title about stuffing kids into lockers, especially after the controversy caused by Bully’s original release. You don’t even play as a bully in Bully, but the fact you could be a terror on the playground meant that controversy swiftly followed, hence the swift UK name change. Indie games like Troublemaker or Project Sugar might try to offer some schoolyard scrapping action, while Lost Judgment’s side stories gave us a heightened reality take on life as part of a Japanese high school, but we’ll probably never see a big company go in hard on a concept like this again.

You know, unless ATLUS wants to abandon the supernatural elements of Persona for a barney behind the bikesheds instead.

 

4. Devil May Cry

Listen, Devil May Cry would absolutely get made today, as Capcom are still putting out plenty of games about carving up big monsters with a sword. On top of that, while they might not sell like gangbusters every time, people love playing character-action games that allow you to perform stylish combos on any monsters unfortunate enough to be within your vicinity.

While it’s been about nearly six years since the last new Devil May Cry game, we reckon Capcom have it in them to make a new one, especially with the Netflix anime from the creators of the Castlevania series on the horizon. Sure, series director Hideaki Itsuno might have left Capcom, but other franchises have lived on long after some key staff have called it quits in the past, so DMC can do it too.

What we’re referring to with Devil May Cry of not getting made today is the process by which it was made. It’s a well known story at this point about how the gameplay and combat for Devil May Cry came about due to a glitch when Capcom were making Onimusha, unintentionally allowing players to perform juggle combos. Meanwhile, Hideki Kamiya and others were trying to make Resident Evil 4, but they felt their game wouldn’t fit the RE formula. Kamiya saw the Onimusha glitch, decided to reproduce it in his project, and the result was Devil May Cry.

It’s a very haphazard, lightning in a bottle method of development, and it just feels like unintentional ideas and the creation of accidental magic aren’t given the chance to be explored in the AAA gaming space, especially when games are taking longer and longer to make — where would a studio even find time to make a brand new idea alongside their core IP these days? As Naughty Dog has shown, you just…don’t.

 

5. Mr Mosquito

Where do we begin with a game like Mr Mosquito? Arguably among the most weird games ever made, any version of Mr Mosquito that was made today probably wouldn’t include a level where you’re sucking the blood of a teenage girl as she’s taking a bath. Especially one published by Sony. Shout out to Astro Bot, though.

As a mosquito, it’s your job to harvest enough blood from the Yamada family to ensure you have enough food to last through the winter, so across the game’s 12 levels, you’ll try to sneakily get your blood without the family spotting you. Alerting the family to your presence can result in instant death if you’re feeding, while flying around triggers a boss battle of sorts. Say what you want about Mr Mosquito, but it’s definitely unique and innovative for its time.

Unfortunately, that one of a kind nature is going to be the reason why we’ll never see a game like Mister Mosquito again in this day and age. While the game was published worldwide by Fresh Games, a subsidiary of Eidos designed to port games from Japan, the original Japanese release was published by Sony, with Japan Studio even assisting on the game’s development. These days, Sony wouldn’t be caught dead making a game like Mr Mosquito, though they’re definitely glad they did make it once upon a time, even porting it to PS4 and PS5 for nostalgia.

Games like Mr Mosquito are something Sony can point to in games like Astro Bot and say “look at the imagination we have to offer” before peddling a remaster to games you’ve already bought twice already. Any version of Mr Mosquito these days would be a straight to Steam indie game, and Sony/PlayStation just aren’t going to play in that space.

 

6. Whiplash

Anyone expecting either one of Metallica’s best songs or an angry JK Simmons launching stuff at your head will probably be disappointed by the premise of Whiplash, a 3D platformer from Crystal Dynamics of all people.

You control Spanx, a long tailed weasel that’s been chained to a psychotic rabbit named Redmond, with the two forced to work together in order to escape an animal testing facility. Instead of using stealth, cunning or guile to accomplish your goals though, Spanx basically flings Redmond about the place, using him to batter human scientists or traverse the various hazards that litter the laboratory. If you think the idea of using a rabbit like a mace to dispatch your enemies sounds like it’d piss off animal rights groups, you’d be correct.

Again, the bulk of the controversy seemed to occur in the UK, with the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, the chairman for the House of Commons and even the police all bashing Whiplash ahead of its release. Much like Bully a few years later, Whiplash appeared to those people like a game encouraging animal cruelty, though the story and messaging of the game is about trying to stop an animal testing facility. It’s just that Whiplash did it in a very Looney Tunes inspired way, complete with cartoonish levels of silly violence. The furore didn’t stop Whiplash from selling, but in today’s climate, with organizations like PETA staging protests inside Animal Crossing, or PETA running the “Mario Kills Tanooki” campaign, releasing a game like Whiplash would be a headache no one wants to deal with.

Think PETA should do something about their ridiculous kill rate within shelters before throwing stones or killing animals or whatever their favourite hobbies are, but hey.

 

7. Shellshock: Nam ‘67

We’ve seen plenty of video games try to put their spin on the Vietnam War, largely seen as one of the most pointless conflicts in a human history filled with them. Good soundtrack, though.

Oftentimes, gaming’s depiction of Vietnam amounts to a bunch of patriotic Americans mowing down everything that moves while Fortunate Son plays in the background, but some try to shine a bit of a light on the more brutal elements of it all. The fear, the dread, the prevalence of drugs and prostitution, you don’t really get any of that while playing Call Of Duty: Black Ops aside from one Deer Hunter reminiscent scene. That’s why Shellshock: Nam ‘67 is somewhat interesting, as Guerrilla Games made no attempt to clean up the perception of the Vietnam War.

Yeah, those Guerrilla Games, by the way.

While Shellshock didn’t launch with too much controversy at the time, even spawning a sequel in 2009, it’s definitely not getting a PS Plus Classics port any time soon, and it’s possibly because of how it refuses to shy away from the worst parts of the conflict. Games based on real life conflicts, or even ones inspired by real life conflicts, will often tell a more sanitized version of events, one that often makes the West look good or makes Russians/the Middle East look bad. Look at how Modern Warfare’s Highway Of Death rewrote real life American war crimes, or a game like Six Days At Fallujah which ignores the American use of white phosphorus on Iraqi civilians.

We’re not saying that Shellshock handled the issue with taste, as the prostitutes proclaiming they’re “so horny” haven’t aged well, but between this and Spec Ops: The Line, military shooters that actually depict war as hell aren’t that common anymore.

 

8. Burnout 3

At this point, we’re just bringing up Burnout in an effort to goad Electronic Arts into doing something with the property instead of sitting on it, while Need For Speed gets countless releases every other year it seems like.

The earliest Burnout games, specifically Burnout 2: Point of Impact, were a great antithesis to other racing games out there, encouraging players to perform more stunts and take more risks to earn more boost and get the edge over their opponents, but it’s Burnout 3: Takedown where the series really shines. The introduction of the takedown mechanic, rewarding players for racing dirty instead of clean, made for a cathartic experience, especially as you watch the replay of a rival car flying into the air because you’ve just rammed them into a city bus. Throw in the excellent Crash Mode and the brilliant punk rock/emo soundtrack, and it’s no wonder that Burnout 3 is as beloved as it is, and we’re never getting it again.

With EA focusing Criterion’s efforts on Need For Speed, the Burnout series has been left to rot since the party game, Burnout Crash, back in 2011. It was fine, but it wasn’t Burnout. Making a racing game with destruction and carnage as the main focus doesn’t seem to be a priority anymore for larger racing game developers, and the reasons for that are unclear.

It’s possible that car manufacturers are unwilling to hand over licenses to their cars if they’re going to look like they’re on the scrap heap, or all the pile-ups causing a bit of a fuss in the news. Meanwhile, indie developers like Three Fields Entertainment, formed from ex-Burnout devs, are trying to revive the destructive arcade racer, but it’s not like they have EA money behind them.

 

9. Ico

Another one in the column of inventive Sony games they’re glad they’ve already made, Ico was a huge part of Sony’s exclusive line-up for the PS2. A minimalist third person adventure experience, Ico follows the titular hero as he’s dragged off to castle to be sacrificed. The lad escapes and quickly runs into Yorda, a fellow captive who speaks a strange language. Before long, the two are having to run from shadow creatures as the two try and find a way to leave the castle behind them.

In terms of premise alone, Ico could easily be made today, as trying to guide and protect an NPC companion is nothing particularly rare, only Ico has a cooler art style.

What’s stopping Ico from being made today is the fact that the game is incredibly, wonderfully simplistic. For a large part of the game, you’re either pushing and pulling objects to solve puzzles, holding hands with Yorda to guide her through the castle, or dodging shadow creatures looking to pulverize you. A modern Sony game these days would need to add some kind of RPG progression system, DLC costumes for Ico and Yorda and a string of other miscellaneous bollocks that would get in the way of the original game’s spirit.

Bluepoint could certainly accomplish a proper remake of Ico, considering they pulled off the Shadow of the Colossus remake skillfully, but again, that simplicity would stop Sony from charging $50-70 as the next big exclusive, and we’re not convinced Sony are interested unless it’s some kind of big statement release.

 

10. America’s 10 Most Wanted

Ooh boy.

Released as Fugitive Hunter: War On Terror in the US, which is a much worse name if we’re being honest, America’s 10 Most Wanted gave players the opportunity to do something that most of the world wanted to do ever since 9/11: compromise Osama Bin Laden to a permanent end. Controlling Generic American Military Man #37, you’re traveling around the world taking down some of the biggest terrorists and wanted criminals of the time period. Considering this was released in 2003, the list includes obvious baddies like Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein, and we’ve got to give Black Ops Entertainment credit for using real life terrorists for its bosses, instead of just fabricating a vaguely Middle Eastern country and making them the villains. Looking at you, Modern Warfare.

The praise ends there though, as America’s 10 Most Wanted is a barely held together turd of an FPS game that inexplicably turns into Tekken whenever you’re about to take down one of the most wanted. Seriously, there’s a 3D fighting game mechanic in a military shooter, and it’s very much plops As it should be, if we’re honest, but it’s still ridiculous to think about.

Like we covered with Shellshock, most military shooters like to shy away from the realities of various conflicts, so naturally, no one is making a new version of America’s 10 Most Wanted, and putting real people in games without their blessing just probably wouldn’t fly today legally, even if they are uh massive terrorists. It also helps that since Osama and Saddam died, the world doesn’t have the same kind of universally accepted person to villainize.

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