"...when they aren't being trapped in an anachronistic sauna, poltergeist attack victims mysteriously bleed from the eyes, which is nearly 100% fatal in alleged poltergeist attacks."
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Netflix Nasties
Stabford is here to guide us through the minefield of the worst films on Netflix.
SPOILER: there are lots of them.
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Death Race 2050
"It's hard to turn global famine into clickbait."
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Rescue Mediums
It's compelling and binge-worthy because it's so awful.
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Most Likely To Die
Alumni gather at a friend's house for their 10-year reunion when they're stalked by a masked figure in this boring…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives In…
A woman cares for an invalid novelist in a house haunted by the vengeful spirit of Stanley Kubrick and little else…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: The Wicker Man (The Nicolas Cage One)
Nicolas Cage is mildly threatened by an secretive society of female apiarists in this tepid remake of the tepid…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Bigfoot (1997)
Hello, I'm Stabford Deathrage, and today we're going to review the documentary film Bigfoot from 1997, or Mystery…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Hellevator
Regular people compete in 'horrifying' challenges in a slaughter house for cash prizes in this TV game show. Maybe…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES – Slow TV: Train Ride Bergen To…
https://youtu.be/GTtVYUDbpW0 To commemorate the 100th anniversary of the Bergen Train Line, the entire journey from…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: They’re Watching (2016)
A home improvement reality TV show focuses on a house where a witch was burned at the stake in this cliched,…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Zoombies (2015)
Animals in a high-tech zoo become zombies for some reason in this terrible Asylum horror film. A CGI primate goes…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs (2015)
An explosion causes the reappearance of dinosaurs in a western mining town in this not-especially horrific horror…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: The Ouija Resurrection
Theater-goers are preyed upon by the ghost of a child-eating monster unleashed from a Ouija board because why not…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Little Dead Rotting Hood (2016)
NOTE: We did have a video for this, but then YouTube removed it. Why? Who knows. Because they're buttholes? Let's…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Wrecker (2015)
Today we're going to wreck the horror film Wrecker. Two young women are pursued by a vengeful truck driver in this…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Night of the Wild (2015)
Dogs attack after a poorly-rendered meteor crashes in a small town in this unintentionally hilarious Asylum film.…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Stranded (2013)
Astronauts working on a lunar base during a meteor storm encounter a strange infectious disease that results in a…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Indigenous
A fun-loving group of American tourists vacationing in Panama indulges in obligatory music montages, slo-mo party…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: Playback
A malevolent entity possesses teens due to VHS crime scene footage in this derivative horror film slightly starring…
STABFORD DEATHRAGE’S NETFLIX NASTIES: ‘Hold Your Breath’ (2012)
After failing to hold their breaths while driving past a cemetery, a murderous ghost possesses an SUV filled with…